The other day I was laying in bed and was just about to get out and get you breakfast for you and your sister, but I decided to lay in bed for a few extra minutes. While laying in bed, I heard you get the bowl from the cupboard, the cereal out of the cabinet and the milk out of the fridge. Then I heard you quietly walk towards Chloe and you nicely asked her what she wanted for breakfast. It was that moment Finlee John, that I knew you are truly on your way to independence and that I was saying goodbye to my boy.
I laid in bed and smiled.
My heart was bursting with pride, but at the same time aching this sharp, stabbing ache. Because my heart knew, deep down, that you’re a step closer to becoming a men and a step further from the baby you once were 7 years ago.
You are no longer the baby who loved to sit in my lap and read, the baby who would dump everything out on the floor and smile that beautiful smile.
You are no longer the toddler who loved everything Fireman Sam, Lightning McQueen, going to the park, playing ball with Daddy, exploring Nana and Pop’s farm in your rubber boots and just being a typical boy.
You are no longer the young boy who loved Ninja Turtles, wanting to play with dump trucks, matchbox cars and gone are the days of dress up.
You are however, eager to learn every word to Bryan Adams Summer of 69, you long to get on the footy field and work on your skills, you are even wanting “space” to do your own thing. Your creativity and imagination has blossomed, the games you play with your friends are so different now and the way you speak is with confidence, bigger words and with more thought.
But Finlee John… You still believe in Santa, the Tooth Fairy, Bobo our Elf on the Shelf and I will continue to help you believe for as long as I can. You also still love to hold my hand, you kiss me good-night every night and the first thing you do every morning is hug me. You still play hide n seek with Chloe and I, you’ll still sit and do arts and crafts and we still read books together nightly.
It’s these moments I need you to know I cherish.
It’s these moments I’m hanging onto because soon they’ll just be a memory, a moment we once shared.
As we enter your new stage in life, I want you to know we enter this together. As you grow, I’ll grow. I’ll learn to adapt because you mean too much to me for me not to grow with you.
So excuse me while I get the tissues, have a cry to myself and dwell on the delightful baby you once were and the equally delightful young man you’re becoming.
I’m saying goodbye to my boy, but welcoming the young man you’re becoming.
I love you Finlee John and I look forward to growing with you.
Love always,
Mommy
xoxo
About the Author
Angela is an author, entrepreneur, blogger, business coach, mental health clinician and most importantly a mother. She explores various topics related to parenting/children on her blog and also in her four books: 30 Days, 30 Ways for Mothers to Take Care of Themselves, 30 Days, 30 Ways for Connecting with Your Child , Healthy Snack Ideas for Kids and 30 Days of Christmas Cheer – A Month of Holiday Traditions and Memory Making.
Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram and her website Finlee and Me.
